Dear ol' Cottey C..

Friends and foes,

I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW >_<! I haven't posted in over a month. oops. I've been very busy and it's been a stressful month!
A few months ago, the Duck Game here at Cottey was put on HOLD. Uh hi. This is bullshit.
If you know anything about Cottey, you'll know that it's HUGE on traditions, that is one of the largest selling points they come at you with when they're vying for your attention when you're applying to all your colleges senior year.

Needless to say, that infuriated most of the women I know and live with.
It's frustrating being told when you're a senior, with pranking being one of the best parts hands down of being a senior, and you aren't allowed to do it anymore, you must not prank, freshmen can say duck. It's a kick in the gut when you weren't allowed to do it last year, and when you finally get to the point where you can do it you're told not to.

So we tried in every way to revolt, without our senior class president behind us, and people blaming OUR hall for it, we decided to let sleeping dogs lie. Things still go down, but we know that they'll only tighten the grip on our throats if we try anything >:(

Shmaaaanywho.

I have decided that I am not returning to Cottey next semester. It was nearly one of the HARDEST decisions of my LIFE.
I am in love with all of my friends here, they mean more to me than they will ever know and I would go down for any one of them. But my financial aid got screwy, and I just don't have the funding to come back next semester. Which stinks :( I am frustrated and my feelings are hurt. I want to stay here badly, but I was only left with one choice, that being, leave Cottey and study back home.

The hardest part was that I was given only a week to make the decisions. 5 days to decide where i'm going to be in 2 months. Awesome.
I had to tell them by friday because I had to pull out of the france trip D: and it was $400 cheaper to pull out on friday, than on the next monday.
I didn't want to think about it or deal with it but I had to decide in a week and the frustrating thing was that I knew I was left with just one option, I just didn't want to have to face it.

So that's where my life is right now. I am going home December 16 for good. I'll be going to college at home, and working, hopefully moving out within the year. We'll see where the year takes me though, and what happens.
I still have my goals, and I know i'll end up there some day.
I'm just taking an alternative route to get there :)

love love love,
-Ashley

(Also, check out my tumblr if you want, www.smashleyyxo.tumblr.com)

Ghouls and Goblinas,
happy early hallowizzeen:) school has been good. My midterms lasted a week and a half! bah! but i'm done with them now, got better grades on all of them than I expected :D I'm very proud of myself! Things have been going preeettyy well since then. Weird stuff going on at home, but i'm trying to not let that shit get to me because i'm at school and honestly that's all I have the energy to do, is just be at school.
If you're blind.. I'm not exactly sure why you're reading this... if you are able to see and have been admiring that freakin' HAWT zombie to the left, (oh yea bby, that's moi.) then you're one of the lucky ones! :) Last night was one of my FAVORITE traditions at Cottey, called GP or Great Pumpkin, it's our halloween tradition, where all the seniors get together and as suites, put on a haunted house somewhere on campus for all the freshladies. It's a big secret for the freshmen, they don't know what's going on until the day of, and they don't even know about the haunted house, they just hear the charlie brown 'Great Pumpkin' story and then are sent off to our haunted house! We have to keep it a big secret as well, sneaking around, taking random items to the basement of a hall, having weird hair, (like my mullet?) and secretly googling how to be a zombie... "just because we're curious."
So our room in the haunted house was the FIRST one the freshies saw, so we really got to get their blood pumping a little bit. We had the haunted maternity ward with bloody handprints all over the walls, girls screaming in pain as they're having my zombie babies, (yeah, I was a hill people white trash zombie baby daddy. what's up.) lots of blood, zombie makeup, screaming, dragging body parts, and in one case, dragging a baby by her umbilical cord, and Allison's perfect rendition of a jacked up birthing scene. It was amazing and we got lots of good screams, although Natalie, and Myself have sore throats and sound a little froggy:) it was absolutely worth it even though the process was bullshit. I learned a lot about the way things are run around here and it irritated me to no end. It was terribly frustrating and obnoxious. Some people were more than ridiculous, didn't discuss anything, and went off and did their own things, people couldn't make up their mind and made other people change plans. It wasn't the end of the world, just a learning experience on what makes a good leader and how different people have different priorities.
that's all for now, yo.
love love love,
Ashley.

Dear mid-term stress, go die. Love, Me.

Dearest Muthaeffas!

Ahh, it's effin' midterms week! Bah. This week is bullshit. I can completely understand the number of suicides at universities around the middle of each semester because midterms has made me give our windows a triple take and decide my brain would just make a mess on the cement below.
I had the first half of my Political Science midterm and a math quiz on wednesday, thursday.. well.. wasn't my day. I didn't attend my classes but I didn't have tests so that's good right?
Today, I had a mental breakdown! Whoopee! and I also had the second half of my political science midterm, this was the essay portion. We were given the questions and what we were expected to do, then just had the write out the essay in class today. I know mine wasn't A work, but I suppose that's okay.
Monday, I have my math midterm (shoot me in the face with a rifle, plz.) and tuesday, I have my human anatomy midterm. 132 questions.. 103 on bones, the topography of them, where they are in the body, special fancy pants long names. Aaaawesome.
Gah! So that's what i'm doing right now. Studying. Stressing. Being frustrated as heck!
I suppose that comes with the territory of college right?

Sorry this one wasn't hilarious and fantastic.. but i'm kind of a joke right?
So here's a bunny with a santa hat and a quote from a popular youtube video.

Allllll my love, 

Ashley:)

ohhh, she said the D word!

Bitches and Hoes,

(I've really wanted to use that for a while, but didn't want to offend anybody.. but all I really do is offend people because of my blunt honesty so BAM. it's there.)

Sometimes, I really really love my college, I was talking about it with some of my freshmen the other day, and I really feel polar opposites about this place.. i'm either absolutely fond of it and love it at the moment, or i'm ready to hitch-hike back home. One of the things that makes me love this place so, is the traditions. I'm a traditional senior, meaning I take part in pranking, get pranked, do pranking, and I participate in all the traditions.
The shexy's in that picture a la gauche [to the left] are left to right Natalie, Kate, Becca, and I! This is us as sexy seniors;) We have a tradition here called Dottey Cottey. We dress up as old ladies and sing to our beautiful freshladies:) we went to Wal-Mart after with one of our freshmen in her jumpsuit, and Nat and I as old ladies "Marie" and I was "Rose" we used our middle names as our elderly names! bahah.
I think the traditions really hold this place together.. It's fantastic, it's so much fun for the seniors and for the freshmen.. the pranking is AWESOME as well!
When you live in such a small town and there's not a whole lot to do.. it's about 11:30 at night.. everybody kind of looks at each other with this menacing look.. the pranking is ON. The pranks are harmless and creative "consequences" for freshmen saying the word DUCK, or just silly pranking of a suite, sneaky fun with a nice little adrenaline rush!
Adds a little excitement to the mundane college life as well.
I do really enjoy this place, it's changed me, who I am, my thoughts, i'm a more confident and empowered woman because of coming here.. but sometimes it feels like the negatives outweigh the positives, but I suppose that can ring true with any challenge.

I hope this monday is fantastic for you.. as for me i'm going to go to the hospital for blood tests! Yay!
Be empowered.. believe in yourself and know that other people believe in you too.

Whoever thought of secondary education was a real bitch

XX and XY,

Sorry I haven't posted in a while! I know nobody reaaally reads this but hey, makes me feel better if I apologize!

Been busy lately:/ I think that's the only accurate way to put how i've been feeling. busy. Everything is moving a mile a second, I don't have time to sit, think, breathe, text, cry, be genuinely anything. I'm exhausted, I need the weekend about every two days now. 

Had two tests today, and turned in a paper. It was pretty fantastic, things have been sailin' smoothly at college so faaar. It's International day of Peace today, which is AWESHUM i'm sittin' quietly in my suite right now, listening to bob marley and the beatles from the loud speakers across the street:) 

Sometimes, I really dig this place. I really miss home though! baaah. 

I don't have much to post right now.. just hangin' outtt. I hope everything is going well for youu:)

Lovelovelove,

Ashley.

I love college, yeaaah

Chicks and Germs--

       I apologize for not posting any sooner, not like anybody really reads this but I still feel obliged to apologize!
       School has been.. School lately. We're getting into the.. 4th week? Already? Shit. Maybe it's the 3rd week. I think it's 4th.. So we're getting knee deep into tests already! Gah! I've had two math quizzes, which isn't bad.. but I have a Human Anatomy test on wednesday.. and I just completely slept through the class! Sweet!
        Besides that it's going really well actually, i'm understanding what's going on in my classes which is a really good feeling. The Suite is increeedible too!:) we're closer than last year, I might dare to say.. And there are always people in the suite, which is such a sweet thing, it's like coming home to all your best friends that are waiting for you! I love the girls I live with, and I know in future posts  i'll say how much I hate this school and living with girls is a cruel and unusual punishment, but I do love them. Our freshmen are so funny, and our adopted freshmen are the coolest! I'm so excited to be starting off this year with them, but it's unnerving thinking about the end of the year.. we only have 9 more months here.. And I don't want it to fly by!
         I think that's all to update right now! I'll be better about posting:P

Love,
Ashley

Labor Day Haaaangover

Females and Males--

        First. Happy Labor Day:) I still had class today! Frickin' frack. I had a good weekend, did homework on saturday! Took the fun out of the day but I got to hang out with some good friends so that was awesome! Went to Joplin on sunday, there's a MALL there! A mall! With stores! It was fantastic to bond and hang out with my two best senior friends Natalie and Becca, we also got in trouble at the mall. For taking silly pictures in sunglasses. In Icing. Some old lady started bitchin' about how it was against store and mall policy. Excuse me? Since WHEN. Has it ever been posted that photography is against mall policy? I know that isn't general knowledge of the public, I felt it was completely unfair that she snapped at us in such a manner. I wanted to Hulk out on her, but there were children around...she's lucky.

         One of the things I like so much about this school is the friendships you make with the girls you live with, sure, it's not always awesome living with a bunch of girls. It's true, everybody does sync up so you're all ticking grump-bombs at the same week of the month, and as much as that does suck, it's the good times that get you close and keep you together when the goin' gets tough and you want to rip your roommates face off. The relationships i've made here compare to no others. Your suitemates feel like your best friends. I could never replace my best best friends and anybody who knows me knows that i'd never replace them, I just feel like i've added on.

          Living with these girls is a lot like marriage. You see each other every day of the week, eat meals with them, bicker over silly things, shower in the same place, and learn how to pee with somebody else in the room. It sure as hell teaches you a lot about yourself, and the way you live with other people, it's fantastic, helpful, and enlightening. As much as it sucks you really learn from it:)

         Oh, had quite an adventure last night, got stuck in the muuuud. Way deep! I had to get out in barefeet, hike my jeans up and go jump in the back of the truck to help gain traction. Didn't work. Some kids drove up so we started a party on this muddy back road. It was pretty fun, Finally got the truck out of the mud...aaaand the battery is dead!
        
         Perfect.

         So we waited and those kids came back with party essentials, and we just hung out, it was nice to kick back, enjoy a little fire, see the stars, enjoy each others company:) It was awesome! I'd love to stay and talk more but my stomach feels like it's on fire.

Peace and Love--
Ashley